Blue Eyes and Soul Kissing
by river-woman
Summary: Billy comes home for Christmas with a new perspective on Michael. This is a year after the movie. Just some gentle kissing, nothing squicky. Also, this is my first Billy Elliot fic, so please be kind. Or at least constructive. Revised as of August 4th


  
  
It had already been one year. He couldn't believe it. One whole year had gone since Billy left Everington for London to live his dream. To become a ballet dancer. The time had seemed to go in a blink of an eye. It felt like he had just arrived and now he was coming back home to spend Christmas with his family. It was exciting. He wanted to tell everyone how great London is, how hard his training can be, and the new friends he made. Most of all, he wanted to see all the old faces he missed so much. Especially one. Michael's.  
  
Billy can still remember when his best friend told him he was gay. Well, he didn't really, not in so many words, but he did kiss him on the cheek after warming his hands. At this thought, Billy reached up and touched the place where Michael's lips had so sweetly and softly caressed. It was innocent, but with a hidden passion behind it, something that was still undiscovered by even Michael. The look in his eyes was one of trepidation that Billy would reject him. Of course, he wouldn't do that to Michael, he was his best friend after all, but he still needed to figure himself out. He was adamant that he "wasn't a pouf," but the kiss confused him greatly.  
  
The ballet school helped him understand a few things; like that it was just fine to feel love for another man. That it was just fine to love anyone because it's the most wonderful feeling in the world and gender shouldn't matter. He didn't believe it at first, but he slowly eased into the idea. The first time he saw a two boys kissing, he blushed and looked away, but the image wouldn't leave his brain. They looked beautiful to him, the way they embraced each other, the way their lips moved together. It made his heart stir with something he had never known before. They made him want to find someone to kiss like that. Someone whom he could love.  
  
Try as he might, however, Billy couldn't find it in himself to see the other boys as attractive. Not even the one with the wide blue eyes and golden hair, Joshua, that always seemed so helpful when he wanted someone to practice with. No, his first kiss, first real kiss, had to be with a boy that he felt strong emotion, not just attraction. Another pair of blue eyes would enter his mind, but these eyes were tinged with green. They were so big and sad, that Billy's heart would break just looking at them. When he realized it was Michael's eyes that made him feel warm in his chest, he fell over in surprise during mid-afternoon practice and had to have some ice put on his sore ankle. Since then, he waited anxiously for the holidays to hurry home.

He thought about what he was going to do when he saw Michael. He couldn't just go and say, "Hey guess what? I like boys, too, so let's go snog somewhere!" No, that just would not do. Billy didn't have much time to think when it was time to get off the bus he had been riding on. He was nearly crushed by the giant hugs from his father and Tony, his brother. They quickly took his bags and together walked back to their little house. Billy talked a mile a minute, telling them everything that happened to him since he had gone. He didn't think he ever saw a bigger smile on either of their faces than that day.

As he described everything he had seen and felt (with the exception of a few moments), Billy looked up at his family. He never thought he'd miss them as much as he did. While he had the chance, he was going to memorize their faces. Billy wanted to commit to memory his father's features first. He had never really looked before, but when he did, he noticed all the lines that crisscrossed it. Small marks from worry, hard work, and determination. But there was more there. There were creases around the Jackie's eyes and mouth from laughter and happiness. Billy suddenly remembered the first time he had actually noticed those lines. It was when he had received his letter of acceptance to the Royal Ballet School. There was a content weariness in his father's eyes. It made Billy smile even wider. 

Then, his brother. What could he really try to say about him? Tony was the bane of his existence for the first ten years of his life. He hit Billy every time he even thought about using his brother's records. Tony never showed Billy any real compassion or caring whenever Billy needed it. But it didn't matter anymore. He decided that in a second. When Billy truly needed it, when his dreams were at risk, Tony forgot about all his pettiness and focused all his energy on his little brother. The thought almost brought tears in Billy's eyes, but he fought them back. He looked at his brother's handsome face. Tony's left eye was still a little darker from his fight with the Pinkertons about a year ago. It'll never fully heal. But he can see with it, which was the main thing. He had an attractive, lopsided smile that Billy knew for a fact drew in the girls. He was never so proud to have Tony as his older brother. 

Finally, he looked at them both. They were strong men, they were miners. They had rocks in their blood and sometimes, though Billy would never admit it to them for fear of getting his ears cuffed, rocks in their head. He felt his chest expand with pride and gladness when he thought about how lucky he was to have these two men as his family. Suddenly, he noticed them looking at him strangely. Billy suddenly realized that he had been staring at them for several minutes without speaking. He shook his head. 

"Sorry, got lost for a minute," he apologized. 

"A minute? Try eleven years," Tony replied with a smirk. That earned him a cuff on the shoulder by Billy, which he was surprised to find that it wasn't all that weak. "Gettin' stronger there, mate?" 

"Well, ten hours of practice five days a week will do that." Billy couldn't help but beam at them. 

"Ten hours? They're killing you, boy," his father said. 

"Nah, it doesn't bother me anymore. I like it." 

"Well then, since you're so used to harsh conditions, you won't have trouble getting used to sleeping on the floor. I rented your room out." The look on Jackie's face was all seriousness, but Billy missed Tony's smile that had disappeared almost immediately. 

"What?" Billy looked at them in horror. "I thought that was joke." 

Their father looked back and forth between Tony and Billy before bursting into laughter. "I'm sorry, son, I couldn't resist." 

"So, you didn't rent out my room?" Billy looked at both his father and brother with a mix of relief and annoyance. 

"Of course not. Who would I be able to find that could put up with Tony's snoring?" 

Tony took a mock swing at Jackie. 

Tony glanced up and, with a smile, said, "Well, look who's here early."

They reached their small house and Billy nearly gasped. There, leaning against the wall, was the owner of the pair of eyes he had wanted to see for months. Those eyes were cast downward, as though afraid to look at him. When they finally looked up, he practically fainted. They were so full of joy. He wouldn't have the chance to pass out, though, as another hug, but one that he returned with as much force, crushed him.  
  
His father and brother quietly went inside, knowing that the two friends would be eager to catch up. When they finally broke apart, Michael looked down again. Billy used all his strength not to lift that chin up and kiss him. He now craved those soft lips, but wanted to talk to his best friend first. They sat on the roof where they used to spend their days. Neither spoke first, not knowing what to say, or afraid how the other might respond. Surprisingly, Michael lifted his head up and broke the silence.  
  
"So, how was London?" He spoke in that quieter-than-normal voice, the one he used when he didn't want to interrupt something delicate.  
  
"It was...I don't know where to begin," and he didn't know. There were so many things to tell, so many things to express.  
  
"I can already guess that you work hard. It shows." A blush stained Michael's cheeks and he went back to staring at his feet.  
  
"Yeah, I do. But it's worth it. I haven't had much time for anything else the past year."  
  
"So, you haven't been out prowling the streets, picking up girls?" He looked up, a grin on his face. Billy had to admire him then for his brave face.  
  
"Nah, haven't really thought much of girls." Billy smiled inwardly.  
  
"No? Been that busy, hmm?"  
  
"Well, yeah, but that's not the whole reason," he whispered.  
  
"What's the whole reason, then? Come on, you can tell me?" Michael's voice went back to that quieter-than-normal tone.  
  
"The reason is..." Billy struggled to get the words out.  
  
"It can't be that bad, mate. What, one girl rejected you? Or maybe you're trying to find just the right one? Or is it because there are too many after you? Oh I know—"  
  
"No, you idiot, it's because I don't like girls anymore!" Billy blurted out.  
  
Michael's eyes widened. "What did you say?"  
  
"I don't like girls. They don't do anything for me," he whispered.  
  
"I see. Well, what are the boys at your school like, then?" Michael kept those eyes glued to the ground.  
  
"Nice, I guess. I haven't thought much of them, either. Don't get me wrong, they're handsome and all, especially one named Joshua, but I don't know."  
  
"You don't? Why not? There must be tons that would want you." Then he added softly, "Who wouldn't?"  
  
"Maybe because I only had one person in mind. One that kept me from even looking at all the Joshuas out there. One who has beautiful blue- green eyes that never wants to look up." He took a deep breath. It was right then, or never. "Maybe because my mind was too filled with thoughts of you."  
  
Michael's head snapped up. "Me? I don't believe you."  
  
"What's not to believe?" Billy looked at him bewildered.  
  
"How can you ask that? Are you really trying to tell me that out of all those boys that you've suddenly taken an interest in, that I'm the one you want? Me? Little, stupid me?" His voice was raised slightly.  
  
"Of course," Billy spoke calmly. "And you're not stupid. You're wonderful. You're the best friend I ever had and I didn't realize how much I cared until I left."  
  
"Why are you telling me this?" His voice now quavered.  
  
"I want to kiss you. I've been wanting to for ages and I can't get the thought from my mind. I want my first real kiss to be with someone I care for deeply and I don't think I've ever felt the same for anyone like I do for you." He gazed into Michael's riveted eyes. "Can I kiss you?"  
  
"Well...alright then," was all he said in reply.  
  
Billy slowly leaned in pressed his lips to Michael's. The kiss was soft and chaste; it lasted no more than a few long seconds. When he pulled away, he looked into Michael's eyes, now huge with anticipation, and he moved in again. This time, he wanted a little more. Billy opened his mouth and his tongue went to seek entrance into his. He had never done this before, but he saw it happen a few times. Michael's mouth opened somewhat abruptly, as if startled, and their tongues moved together. Billy almost thought of it as a dance, one that no one but he and Michael could do. He felt as though, through this new and exhilarating ballet, their souls touched. He didn't want to stop. Unfortunately, they needed air and separated. Both of them felt very lonely at that point.  
  
"I liked that," Michael said softly.  
  
"Me too. I wouldn't mind doing that again." Billy moved forward again, but Michael's hand on his shoulder stopped him.  
  
"I can't. You won't be here long. You're only here on holiday and then you'll be gone again. Then I'll be alone. With no friends and only memories to cling to. You will go back to that school with more experience and forget all about me." Tears were evident in his voice.  
  
"That's not possible. You're my best mate. I can't forget you. No matter what happens, we'll always be together, even as friends."  
  
"Do you promise?" Those blue-green eyes looked hopeful.  
  
"You can count on it. And I promise I won't soul kiss anyone while I'm there." Billy nodded.  
  
"Soul kiss?" Michael looked confused.  
  
"Isn't that how you felt? Like our souls touched? I don't think I could soul kiss anyone else, even if I wanted to." He smiled weakly.  
  
"I don't think I could either. Ok, then. It's a deal. I won't soul kiss anyone if you don't." Michael nodded.  
  
"Shake on it?" Billy asked.  
  
"Actually, I was thinking..." he put his lips on Billy's once again, and they both soared with the beauty of it all.  
  
Not long later, the sun had set and the sky was dark. Billy still didn't go inside his house. He had spent hours on the roof with Michael. He told him everything that happened to him, and in turn, Michael told him how he felt since he left. Between sentences, they would stop and kiss some more, and both their hearts would swell with the love and friendship they had for each other. Under the dark sky they both lay, side-by-side, Michael's head on his shoulder. He knew right then that no matter what, they would always be together as best friends and they will never be able to kiss anyone else the way they did that day and every other time they did.  
  
No one else would be able to replicate the elation of their dance of mouths under the setting sun, or the rising moon when blue eyes met blue- green, and their souls kissed.


End file.
